Thursday, February 26, 2015

Create a Money Date in 5 Simple Steps



Maybe you've heard of a "money date" before, and maybe not. I'd like to set the stage for you and show a little bit of what our world looked like before we discovered the incredible money date.


Our world before "money dates" meant our date nights - and I mean real dates, dinner, movie, romance - usually had some money component to the date. By that, I mean that at some point during the date, I'm sure one of us would bring up one version of the following statements:

"Where does the checking account stand?" 
"Hey, how much can we afford for our honeymoon?" 
"Could we do this excursion?" 
"I was thinking about our next vacation, do we have the money?"

And then our romantic date becomes a heated conversation about what each of us are doing wrong with money, getting frustrated that the other person doesn't understand us.


We're not exactly sure how we learned or heard about the idea of "money dates," but the basic idea is pretty simple.

Set aside time in your schedule to talk about money. A money date.


Now, the best result you can get from this is pretty wonderful. Not only do you get a better understanding of your finances, but you get your date nights back! Double huzzah!

So, how do you go about starting money dates?

It's pretty simple.

Set a time.


Originally, we tried to do our money dates once a month. It would work okay for a couple months, then we would let it slide until something bad happened. Then we would have money dates again, let it slide. You get the idea.

Our money dates work a lot better now that both of us regularly (semi-weekly, if not daily) check our bank accounts and see what we've spent. We've gone to a semi-monthly schedule for our money dates, meeting around the times we get paid, the middle and end of each month.

Gather any resources.


Like in our work lives, we all hate meetings where people aren't prepared! Money dates are the same. Make sure you come to the table (or couch, coffee shop) with the information you need to have a good conversation. Is this a list of transactions for the time in-between money dates? Maybe it's the amount of money in each of your accounts, including any debt. Do you have a calendar of when bills are due or scheduled to be paid? These are all things you can bring to your money date.

Stick to the plan.


Respect each other and the money date. If you say that you're going to talk about only one or two items, focus on finishing your discussion on those first before moving to other potential items. We've had one-too-many money dates derailed by heading down a different road than what we planned. Likewise, if you've both agreed to talk for an hour, respect that decision. If you can get done quicker, that's better!

Review.


At the end of the money date, quickly go over any decisions made during your meeting. Did you decide to change your automatic savings plan? Change it. Did you change your budget around for next month? Change it. Need to put a new bill in the calendar? Put it on the calendar. The worst part of this journey is getting to the next money date realizing you didn't do what you, or your partner, said you were going to do.

Change for the better.


Money dates have made the financial part of our lives infinitely better. It's a safe place where we discuss money. We don't judge each other for decisions made during the in-between time. We realize that we are two partners on this journey together and these meetings are meant to help us succeed in that journey.

What say you? Do you have money dates? Do you have fun names for them?

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